Uppers & Downers

Uppers


1) Norway

Has the highest standard of living in the world according to the United Nations. Time to pack the fur coat and leave this dump behind.


2) Jewish Superstars

First Sacha Baron Cohen took over the world with Borat and Bruno. Now Barbra Streisand beats Mariah to number one spot in the US.

3) Cagefighing Cross Dressers

The News of the World reports that Jordon's new lover like to put on the suspenders and then a couple of Cagefighter colleagues dish some drag justice on the streets of Swansea. How Butch! If they feel like outsiders they should head to Manchester on a Saturday night.


Downers

1) Champagne

High profile Tory's banned from the Harvey Nic's Champagne tent at the Conference in Manchester. Poor Champagne its hard when friends turn on you


2) Cougar Cash

The Sun reports that Madonna has given toyboy Jesus Luz 1.7 M to buy an pad near the singer new Upper East Side home. If he were a girl and she a man , gold digger and foolish

3) Silvio Berlusconi

The man who divides the Italian Intellectuals from the rest of Italy had been strip of his legal immunity. I don't know you would never have a British PM that could accused of breaking any kind of law.......................................